Thursday, July 17, 2008

On Being Childless

I have been married for more than two years already. It's not a surprise if oftentimes I hear people asking me why don't I have a child yet...

You cannot imagine how to difficult it is to answer such question. Sometimes people assume that my husband and I deliberately refuse to have children. But there are some too who seriously are emphatic on our predicament and even offers prayers helping me and my husband storming the heavens for the gift of a child.

Several times, I have been a principal sponsor to weddings along with my husband and all those whom we sponsored are now raising their infants and kids. I have seen friends who have been married later than us and are now rejoicing in the fact of pregnancy.

Well, at first my husband thinks it was alright for us not to have children. He said he marries me for me and not because of the children I begot. But as time flew by, with all much effort and medical help we sought, and we remain childless, I could somehow sense that he too really wants to have a child pretty soon. And that only the two of us living in our home simply lacks an important person to fill our home: the gift of a child. It doesnt matter to us that we both make ourselves available in service to other people just us both of us are gifted with it. It doesnt really matter of how many people comes to us for help, or how well we find in wisdom in every situation. In all truth, we lack something. And it is not hidden from the people.

Just as I feel genuinely happy for the children born from other mothers, as I consider every child a gift from God, I cannot help but continue to hope and pray that one day,my time to experience in receiving the greatest gift a woman is possesed: that of being a mother, can actually come true.

Somehow, it cannot be denied that the faith in God that I carry inside helps me so much in staying in tranquility and at peace, carrying the truth that God's Omnipotence is greater than anything and that He knows best for all of us. In all these, I choose to keep my faith, hope and love.


  1. I understand what you mean. My husband and I are starting to talk about having children but we haven't made any progress just yet (that we know of). I'm just trying to keep calm and not get all worked up about it. It is odd when all of my friends are have kids now (3 friends had their babies 2 weeks ago and 3 more are due in a few months). I'm just determined to stay calm and trust God.

  2. Hi Me!

    Thanks for that comment. It's nice to know, we are not alone.Thanks for dropping by.Indeed, we must trust God.:-)

    God bless you and your husband too. Let's pray for each other.


  3. hi Lor,musta na?
    I know how it feels, it took us 3 long years to have the first one. Remember David? (your godson) he is now 9 y.o.
    Never lose hope, keep praying, and always remember that HE has a special plan for each one of us.


  4. Hi Dens,

    Thank you very much. Of course, I remember your prayers too and your great faith in God.

    Hope my godson David still remembers me. I still have his picture kadto baby pa sya.

    Pray for us too, Dens.:-)

  5. Hi,
    I don't think it's anything unusual that you still don't have kids after two years of marriage. It took me and my wife a long time as well to have kids. It was really irritating to hear people say, "You still have no kids? Make one already!" As if they'll be the ones to take care of your children or as if they have a right to demand that you have kids, hahaha...
    Anyway, if you really want to have kids, the best way to just relax and enjoy each other -- while you still can! When the kids come, they'll be the center of your world :-)

    Please give my best regards to Jun :-)

  6. Hi Lorelyn,

    You are not alone...God is watching. He knows what is best for you and Jun. In His time, your bundle of joy will come.

    Don't stress out yourself entertaining what others have to say. Instead, focus yourself in being happy and grabbing every chance that you have in enjoying the time with your husband. Use this time to strengthen your bond and love for each other and yourselves. Date as much as you can, go out for movies as often as you want. Together, just enjoy and chill out. Stay away from people who brings negative energies to you and your marriage. There's more to married life than having and taking care of children. So while you wait for the blessing of having your firstborn, "live, laugh and love".

  7. Hello Jo!

    thanks for the words of wisdom you give... so you are in Penang, Malaysia!

    Great to hear from you again!


  8. Hi Allister!

    It's great to hear from you. I met Maricel few weeks ago. nia man sya near sa kiwalan diay ga work.

    Thanks a lot sa imong very nice comment...

    Yes, regards sa daw si Jun nimo.

    God bless nimo and your family always.