Freedom: Its Significance for Me and My Nation

If there is one thing which to me is essential in the existence of a human being for him to attain fullness of his dignity is FREEDOM. One of my favorite movies, the "Braveheart" wherein Willam Wallace's life exalted the value of it when he fought for freedom not only for his own but for his countrymen as when even unto his death, he shouted, "Freedom!!!" It was an unforgettable scene seeing a man restore freedom in an oppressive environment.




More than anything, Christ in my own faith, gave up his life to give all mankind freedom from sin. And thus to me, in all that mankind do it is inherent for him to demand freedom at all aspects in his being as I believe that to exercise freedom, I am likewise mandated to give freedom unto others even from myself the people that I love.


I am privileged enough to live in a country that uses democracy in their governance as enshrined in our Philippine Constitution. Nonetheless, two years before I was born, our country experienced the first attempt to forestall freedom and democracy after our independence as a nation, when President Ferdinand Marcos declared Martial Law on September 21, 1972. Maybe I was too young to understand it then as I grew up since democracy was restored to our country after almost two decades during Cory Aquino's rise into presidency after a bloodless revolution in EDSA, proud to be Filipinos great heritage to the world. But being on my 6th grade already when EDSA took place, I could not forget the all jubilant faces of all significant people of my life when it happened. I fully understood how a country truly needs democracy! Yet even before this community-related sense and thirst for freedom came into me as a young child, I demanded freedom already.



I remembered how I hated cousins older than us during our plays and would turn us very little ones into object of their notoriety by calling us names instead of just explaining why we could not participate in their games, or some old ones who when they notice that parents are not around with their children would throw hurting words or gestures to demean children like us. When chances like this happened as I child, I remembered how I stood up and spoke my words telling them to stop. As a child I already know the value of freedom in the exercise of our uniqueness not to be maligned just because we act and behave differently. Hence, the restoration of my country's democracy through peaceful people power in EDSA strengthened my thirst for it and my attempts to give life into the word FREEDOM.


Freedom, however, does not mean giving human being absolute right to do anything they want even when its contrary to decency, law,morals and public order. Freedom is only freedom when such right is used in doing what is just and right. Our country restored democracy in a totally bloodless revolution. We only used prayers, our weapons were the goodness of our hearts as a Filipino nation gifted with this Catholic and Christian faith. We realized that with our unitive effort of goodness can actually put down from power even the most notorious dictator. Simply put, freedom is a virtue, it is pure in itself and could not survive in a chaotic world when people lives in absolute oblivion to order and balance. FREEDOM can therefore thrive only in peaceful hearts of those who exercise them.


Now and then, my country's experience of Freedom comes on and off when many politicians use their power and influence over the less fortunate and less educated population who are only banking on emotional and sentimental bondings and/or sense of debt of gratitude ("utang na loob") to people who provided them temporary relief, food and shelter who are running for public office. This supposedly positive Filipino value had been used to propagate staying into power political clans perpetually in public office because they have the means and resources from public funds to manipulate the hearts of their countrymen leading to corruption and inefficient governance in most part of my country. (This Filipino Psychology has allowed some scrupulous political leaders the means to oppress their own people as it has not liberated nor freed my own countrymen from their own tendencies and inclinations. )And the latest news that even shocked the world is the "Ampatuan Massacre in Maguindanao", wherein over 50 people; mediamen, lawyers and ordinary people alike were killed in an attempt to stop the filing of Certificate of Candidacy of a political opponent. A sad news for all of us who had experienced the sweetness of democracy and freedom. And in fact in my very own city, Iligan City, where I currently live in Mindanao, Philippines, a local City Councilor physically attacked an anchorman, a radio commentator while on a live broadcast when the said public official was confronted on some government transactions. These acts are to me inimical to the interest of FREEDOM.


On a personal level, I so valued FREEDOM that I give it to my love ones, even freedom from myself, so long as they do things just and morally right . As I believe in the famous quote, "I may not agree in what you say and how you say it but I fight to death your right to say it." As I cannot put into my hands the way a person wants to handle his affairs. And finally, I believe in the God who sent his Son Jesus Christ to bring all people salvation and freedom from sin. He my Maker give mankind complete LIBERTY and FREEDOM either to take on the chance of being freed from eternal damnation or be in Paradise. HE give freely FREEDOM and HE gives it allowing FREEDOM in each supposed recipient to receive or decline. If He freed me from sin through His Death, I will give the same freedom to others and I shall continue to fight for it as FREEDOM is one of the most beautiful fruit of LOVE.


Over a million Filipinos gathered at EDSA showing the world its own brand of Revolution, a bloodless people power calling for FREEDOM from oppressive political leader


Jesus Christ in a Manger the beginning of FREEDOM from sin offered by God to all mankind.

CHRISTMAS: A TIMELESS MEANING

It's few days away from Christmas time. But here in the Philippines, we are forced to hear sad news: Maguindanao Massacre, Martial Law, a president running for a lower post for the next election which could probably lead into Charter Change abhorred by the masses. We get too fixated on these things which we think as our reality that we forgot that Christmas time is in our midst. And that we fail to to experience the joy that it offers us.


As I write this piece, I am but a victim of the same pattern of thoughts but after I got out from the Blessed Sacrament today taking a time of prayer with Him who is the ultimate reason of Christmas joy, Jesus Christ, our Savior, Emmanuel, I cannot help but write this hoping I could infect joy of christmas to those who are in my network the best way possible. And I have made up the following resolutions:

1. I am first and foremost a Christian who believes in Christ and that whatever surroundings there is, I must decide to take the season with utmost waiting, with utmost hope, with utmost joy and finally celebration that a real God once came to us became Man to give us salvation and that in this time of year I ought to take in my heart the meaning of Christmas; that same God who is available daily in the Holy Eucharist, that same God who offers Himself to everyone of whatever faith they embrace as He is present in every creature, in every human being's soul.

2. I am a Filipino and as a citizen of this great nation, I must continue the culture that we have on Christmas time. The sharing of oneself to others and perhaps this time not just physically to our love ones and neighbors near us but thanks God to this internet technology that allows us to share the same degree of camaraderie and sense of oneness to people that once became part of our lives through various types of social networking.

3. I belong to a family who puts premium on giving during Christmas season. It does not have to be in the form of material things but they can always be conveyed in simple gestures of kiss, hugs and well-meaning word of saying " Merry Christmas" "Maayong Pasko" "Maligayang Pasko" or whatever way we best say it and I intend to perpetuate the same sense of love shared on Christmas time.



4. Christmas eve that is December 24 is my birthday. And this year, I am going to accept my birthday in additional happiness as God made me reach this age where I went through different phases of development already and I feel that at this stage, I am duty bound to return all the good things that I receive, all the favors in life that came to me and there is no better way than to place myself in SERVICE to others as a fruit of LOVE. LOVE which is the timeless meaning of CHRISTMAS.



A Blessed Christmas everyone and whether we have met in person, or I only met you in my social network, whether you are a Filipino who lives still in our country or you are a Filipino who works in other country, I hope this piece could touch you once again and may you share LOVE on Christmas 2009.

With all my love along with my husband, Jun and our son Briggs, I pray and hope for all of us a Happy Christmas 2009!

Lorelyn

Manny Pacquiao: How Did I come to Admire Him

I am not alone in my joy on the latest victory that Manny Pacquaio gave his countrymen. This time however, it is not just another win, it is a record-breaker event; he being the only person who garnered seven (7) belts in different divisions of boxing. I am not into boxing field nor a sports critic but I say this piece from the point of view of a Filipino who has admired this person, so do not expect me to understand details on boxing.

How did I first come to know Manny? I remembered I was watching a fight together with my family way, way back then. If I remember right, it was the Golden Boy's (Oscar dela Hoya) fight. But before the fight, we watched an undercard game. Manny. won it! Then I exclaimed to everyone how greatly he resembles to my youngest brother Landrum. It was the first time I saw him and the next thing I know he won in most of all his competitions till he reached the glory and gold that now become him.

I have always watched his game and in fact prays that he makes it everytime and it is because I admire this person and here are the reasons:

1. He gives glory to God. Everytime he wins, Manny never claims the win as his own! He always attribute the glory to God.( Although undeniably he is a very rigid,focused and disciplined athlete which contributed to his success.) In fact in this current win, in an interview he said this, "My power comes from God and this would not have been all possible without Him; I surrender everything to Him and believe in Him 100%." Before the beginning and end of his fight, he always goes to his corner, kneeling and praying and kissing the cross on his rosary.

2. He loves the Philippines. Manny Pacquiao is a patriot. It is obvious in his talks, all the time he would like to share his win to his countrymen. And it made me realize that one can excel in his field if he possessed with the deepest love to the country that nurtured him and it is not exlusive to the privileged Filipinos. He had a very deprived life before fame and riches came into his hands yet he truly loves the Philippines and never complains.

3. He loves his family.

Family where he come from: Manny Pacquiao loves his family. He is a family man. Being a son raised alone by a mother who has been abandoned by her husband for another woman, it was obviously a difficult life for him. Instead of hating his father and wallowing in hatred and revenge, he opted to find means to sustain himself, his siblings and his mother. He openly welcome his father with a forgiving heart when the father showed interest of the family he left behind. He never forgets the basic commandment of God, 'To honor your parents'. (After all, the commandment did not say, "Respect your parents if they are deserving". It was an unconditional command to honor parents despite their imperfections. And God will do the rest if you follow this command.)

Jinkee and Manny: Another thing is the love Manny gives to his own family. Well, I think Jinkee who is a lovely and educated lady married Manny at the time that when he was still starting a boxing career. To me, Jinkee also took a gamble probably because she believed in him and in persevering in her belief in her husband's potential and talent, she is greatly rewarded. And of course, he also cares of their growing children.

With these attributes, I have come to admire this man, a Filipino who brought honor for our country. Having these basic things, I do believe anyone can also succeed in whatever endeavor they got themselves into, whether that Filipino is still in this country or had left the Philippines to work harder for their love ones. It doesn't really matter, what matters is that which is in our heart and actions.

Tita Cory: A Philippine's Legacy to the World

Today, August 5, 2009, is the funeral of our former President Corazon Cojuangco Aquino. I am compelled to write not only because I am blissfully touched of the outpouring of love and respect not only of her own countrymen but the world as well, and also because to me it is a national history worthy of our topic for contemplation and discussion. I am writing this article from a point of view of woman who was only a child when Tita Cory Aquino's name brought into the public limelight by sheer twist of fate in a Providential manner.



To me, Tita Cory is a Philippine's legacy to the world.



History tells us that EDSA Revolution is the only revolution that is bloodless. Many countries tried to imitate the success of our EDSA, but they cannot copy it. It enfolded as it was simply because it was not staged nor manipulated by few politicians or plotters. It was simply the way Filipinos are. But it would not be complete if the woman who was called during that time to fill the role refused. In her words, Tita Cory was not ready for a public life. She prayed, contemplated, weighed her decision well and in the end chosen to play the part she was made to take part, armed only with God on her side and so are the people who placed her on power.



I was very young then. I barely understood politics but in my childhood's mind that event was truly significant because of the way people around me reacted to it, my own parents, grandparents, and relatives who are grown up at that time.



Six years in power she only proved to be courageous despite several difficulties and trials in her governance. As a woman, I understood quite well how difficult it is to take on a lead especially when one is aware that those who are below in position of her are men, well-versed in the world of politics, in military tactics and maneuvers, and many other aspects. She survived coup d' etat attempts. She stood firm and gave hope to her people though sometimes her people wanted her to do miracle by overturning everything right through a magic wand, perhaps. Though she was placed in the most powerful position of the Philippine governance, she exude an aura of being a mother to Filipinos rather than pretending to be like a man. She used her womanly attribute and put it into good use by believing that there are men out there whom she could persuade to do their respective duties and responsibilities out of their own conviction and not because she threatened them. And in that way, she gained the respect of many honorable men.



Now that she has left us for good, it is no doubt to me that our former President Cory Aquino is our legacy to the world. She will always be remembered with incredible affection from her people and the world.



A piece of thought: May Tita Cory now rest in peace, in joining her Creator I know that she continues to be with us by praying for her beloved countrymen! Mabuhay ka, Filipino, saan ka man sa mundo. You can always make a difference and show the world that we are loving, hard-working , and faithful people. And in that way, we too can become a legacy to the world.

Lorelyn T Dumaug: On scandal and maligned publicity

Lorelyn T Dumaug: On scandal and maligned publicity

On scandal and maligned publicity

It's been like a week since the sex video scandal of Katrina Halili and Dr. Hayden Kho, both prominent showbiz personalities, seemed to infiltrate every media avenue: from television, internet, print and the words of mouth spreading so powerfully, and now the highest legislative body of the land, the Senate of the Philippines. I cannot help but give my piece of thought on the issue, as a woman myself and as a citizen of this country.

As I reviewed all issues, I came up with a brief background.

Dr. Hayden Kho gained his prominence after winning a national television show competition and eventually became the popular boyfriend of Vicky Belo, a prominent cosmetic surgeon highly in demand of actors and actresses, models and other artists. Then came the break-up late last year of 2008 of the two apparently caused by a video which the latter discovered that made her decide to break up with the former saying with certainty the evidence of Dr. Kho's infidelity.

And now the video of Katrina Halili with Dr. Hayden Kho proliferates over the internet and in a mass production of the DVD now scattered throughout the country and the world.

Katrina Halili who hails from the beautiful place of El Nido, Palawan instead of retreating to her own private world after the scandal broke out and accept the fact of losing her gained stardom and job, chose to put up a fight. She gained support from various sectors public and private, including Gabriela Women's Party-List, an organization that has its own seats in Congress, responsible for the enactment of the law of Anti-Violence Against Women and Children (Anti-VAWC), the National Bureau of Investigation(NBI) and Bureau of Immigration and Deportation, and finally the Senate of the Philippines, for a full-blown investigation.

After watching the news related to the events that transpired during the Senate hearing headed by Senator Jamby Madrigal's committee, I cannot help but feel compassion and pity for the plight of Katrina Halili. She burst in tears while openly declaring her agony in public, that she lost her job, that she is in a state of thinking time and again that every person she met has probably seen her sex video with Dr. Hayden Kho and lastly the honor of her family that has since been disgraced publicly because of the scandal. She even uttered foul words and languages against Dr. Hayden Kho.

On the other hand, I saw the incident of water splashed over the head of Dr. Kho inside the Senate Hall by a former policeman who could not help his scorn for a fellow man. (My husband says he should not be put to jail for having done so.)

At the outset during the hearing, Dr. Kho is an image of a seemingly innocent man, incapable of such bestial act, penitent in his ways and most probably tried to win public sympathy by his coy manners. His mother was there too! My empathy for her and the whole family. Katrina, on her part, looked so much like a victim, glamorous posture gone.

The presence of these showbiz personalities in the formal aura of a Senate Hall turned it into a circus.

As a woman I'd say, Katrina Halili definitely had her own lapse of judgement by getting herself involved with a man who publicly announced romantic relationship with a prominent figure. But however wrong her decision is (or sinful it is) or however her heart made her do such act (she proclaims she loves Dr. Kho), no woman deserves to be thrown into a public limelight making a most private sexual act seen by the public and accessible by the whole world at that with just a click. And to think it was beyond her knowledge, assent nor consent. I give my utmost admiration for her courage to take a stand and my empathy because what has been done can never be undone and the scandal will forever be accessible to public view. No doubt, the act of Dr. Hayden Kho is violence against women.( It is said there are still 37 sex videos with different prominent women. Whew!!! What kind of a man is he? Psyhologically impaired?) He has violated a law by merely taking the video and collecting them all at that!

As a citizen of this country, I think it is about time that our legislative department would come up with a law that punish perpetrators of this kind of scandal. I am hopeful that after this investigation in aid of legislation, justice shall be served to the victims. But I do not like it done publicly. If serious investigation must be fully done, it should be outside of public view and scrutiny where biases and public sympathy tends to sway objectivity.

Yes, they are prominent figures but they deserve to keep their private lives private. We should not feast over it and I am praying this issue die very soon in the public realm and begin to be discovered privately and a good law will come out of it rather than just being a show for public consumption and appetite.

Let us pray that the perpetrators and victims alike may have their share in silence and reflect on their actions properly. Asking for forgiveness on themselves and their victims and that no pride and arrogance shape the investigation. May woman's true power that comes from a pure virtue and not lust, be the true source of their healing and the loving touch of God be their Omnipotent Source of unconditional love. And for us all, we stop spreading the video, the site and we shall all reflect on our own private lives too!

New Year 2009:Bringing Hope in the Year of our Lord in my Life

In the Philippines, it is still 9:00 O'Clock in the morning of the last day of 2008, December 31, 2008. Few hours from now, all Filipinos from various sector of the society, rich or poor families,whether living within the country or abroad are desirous of gathering in a Spirit of Joy as they welcome another Year of OUr Lord bringing in their hearts new hopes and aspiration, in whatever forms of communication they can.Unlike Christmas which is predominantly given meaning into by Christians all over the world as the celebration of the birth of the Son of God, perfect God and perfect Man, who chose to live among His Creations to give us gift of salvation, New Year is celebrated even to those who do not profess the same faith of a Christian, because whatever one believes or do not believe, the idea of welcoming another year brings everyone to a Spirit of Joy!

Despite the economic crisis that affects everyone's life and the terrorist acts that plagues the world today, all of us is possessed of power within our hands to choose HOPE and LOVE for the year to come. That we are all empowered to be the beacon of hope and spread them to every people near us, first our husbands/wives, children, parents, grandparents,sibilings, nephews and nieces, aunties and uncles, in-laws, relatives, friends and neighbors and the different communities we choose to belong and feel more associated, most productive and get our talents more useful.Personally, the year 2008 passed really so quickly for me. I get myself involved in so many things. First of being a wife trying my best to become a mother with my husband whose public and political life changes the once so private minor services and volunteerism I made as a young university student, as a young law student and as a professional extending myself to others in communities, a person who makes all my knowledge into income potential, a loving daughter to senior citizen parents, a loving aunt to my nephews and nieces, a good aid to my brothers and sisters in their married and single life, a niece showing love and affection to aged aunties and uncles and giving honor to those who already passed away, a daughter and sister-in-law trying to get myself loved and belong to these families whose culture are so much different from mine, a worker of the Parish where I belong, a loving elder ("ate") to children in the neighborhood,a first lady trying her best to be known not as a mere wife to an honorable elected official but to get myself known as I am including the not so good things about me and get myself one of them despite the distance that people tend to place on me as a wife of the man they respect. I only want to convey love to them and show them all that despite my imperfections, I am willing to extend myself whole free from pretense and not as a mere symbol and illusion. And of being an active advocate to a global work of God in Gawad Kalinga and the Couples for Christ where both me and my husband are involved as a couple. And there are still many, many things I want to do and I want to be and people want me to be. The pressure is hard and difficult. I messed up too!But today is such a beautiful day as I started a reflection with my husband on how to make our marriage work better. That we are able to truthfully expressed things that we do not want each other do and only do the most constructive ones. I feel like I am starting it right because I cannot do many other things if I am unable to do things right with the husband to whom I choose to be in this marriage vocation.So the New Year 2009 is full of hope for me. I want to be better, if not best, in the many facets of my life. And just as what I had asked my husband to do, that he will lead me everyday in prayer to God together as married couple bonded in this great Sacrament of Marriage. I do not want to take the lead anymore, I asked him to lead because every husband must bring his wife in adoration to God and lead his children and family into Him.And I asked God too that I may be able to fill things that I failed to do and refrain from doing things that could hurt and destroy him. I feel like I started it right and I choose not be bothered by the preparations of external things like food in the table, parties to make, round fruits on the table to present and only with very simple celebration.

I want to offer myself to God and make the New Year the most happy as it can be as I choose to wait for it with the Lord in the Holy Eucharistic Celebration filled with reflections and resolutions.

My Christmas

It's Christmas time again!

Peoples from all races celebrate Christmas in many ways. But I am most inclined how Christmas is celebrated in my own beloved country. Although a very good friend and mentor of mine who is a foreigner now living back to his country after sharing his life with the people from Mindanao for almost twenty (20) years, Fr. Michel de Gigord, MEP, described that most of his countrymen celebrated it away from the true essence of Christmas by alluding the celebration to Sta. Klaus instead of Christ Himself, the commercialization of the celebration makes people shy away from giving real love to others if they are not able to give gifts, all these and other activities misguided the people of who and what we are celebrating for. It could indeed be alarming but it is a reality in most First World Countries. He further supposed that Philippines is still celebrating it with grand sharing of love with families, friends and small various organizations despite the few and cheap foods found in the table.

Then his observation and comparison brings me to reflect as to what is actually happening here in our country. Has his observation that we Filipinos celebrate it with much love remains the way we celebrate Christmas? Then, I begin it myself, with my own experience of Christmas celebrations. And in so doing, it brings me back to my childhood and all the years that follows.

I was born on Christmas eve to parents who desires for the gift of a child of their marriage of five years. Being born into that circumstance gave me the privilege of a being a child surrounded and raised with love. Every Christmas was a joyful occasion of the family, my birthday added to the bonding of love, not just to my family, to my relatives but also to the Catholic faithfuls in our little chapel, who for lack of priest, do it by "Katilingbanong Pag-ampo". There are years when money is available but when my father became jobless, we celebrated it very,very simply but the most important ingredient remains felt, the sharing of love to one another, the deliberate effort to make others feel that he/she is very much love despite shortcomings as a family member. It has always been a time of showing unconditional love. I remembered the hugs and kisses from my parents, my sister and brothers, my aunties and my uncles. All these made my birthday and Christmas celebrations a beautiful time for love.

When I grew up, I learned to make it my own too! Despite lack of finances, I always try to find ways in making my love expressed to all my love ones especially to my parents who as I observed had so much difficulty and trouble in their married life together. I always make it an opportunity to make them aware how deeply grateful I am, that amidst difficulty they stayed together as married people and continued to show to us their deep love and concern. It was also a time to call on all my brothers to stay together in our house at least for one day just to feel one another's presence. And all of us are looking forward to it!

Time flies and all of us are married except my fourth brother. Although I am the eldest, I married late so there was a time when my being single brings a lot of opportunity in uniting the entire family, my brothers and sister, my brother-in-law and sister-in-law and this time I am already a "Tita" to new members of our family. All the same, with or without much food in the table, it always feel good to be with one another's presence. I always bring my niece and nephews to sing a birthday song to Jesus. And it feels good knowing that the reason why we gather is because we are remembering Him who created us all, on the day He made Himself like one of us.

But my own marriage seems to almost change it all. I do not share the same ways of celebration as my husband does. To him, all this food matters, the system do matter. It's not that I cannot appreciate it, but if all these replace the essence of my Christmas, replacing LOVE with food availability in the table, then it could make me utterly miserable in my Christmas and my birthday as well. All Iwant is to spend it with my love ones.

It brings me back to my reflection: It is not the outward celebration that matters. If I have no finances to bring food to my table on Christmas, then only the spirit of love could make the celebration of Christmas truly an occasion of joy that comes from Christ. He who is God and became our Savior born in a manger of Bethlehem can only be the reason why Christmas is here! Oh Holy Night!

Tomorrow, the Misa de Gallo will start. I have a special intention to pray for. And most of all, I pray that everyone will come back to celebrate Christmas centering it on Christ alone and a veneration to the Blessed Virgin Mother who so willingly made herself a Mother to this God becoming man and to the chaste Spouse St. Joseph. May the image of this Holy Family brings all families together in their knees in joyful coming of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

Mindanao: From My Point of View

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Volunteerism: Is it still here?

Volunteerism.... What does it mean? They say this spirit is already gone. Has it truly gone. Are volunteers within reach?

For me the spirit of volunteerism is the one that ignited my passion to do things for others. I was truly amazed at my teachers in religion, called the catechists, who would endeavor to teach us things about God and His works, without being paid in return! They were the ones that inspired my young mind, thinking that when I am already at the right age, I will do the same for the next generation. Priests, nuns, missionaries and many others that I met in my growing up years in college and even in my young professional years, all the more enkindled that passion. How I admire them giving up personal ambitions just to teach young minds in preparing for their future.

How I love it surrounded by people who selflessly devouted themselves in service of others. I met many of them when I was still a student leader of Catholic Center Campus Ministry, a Chaplaincy founded by a very dear friend priest, Fr. Michel de Gigord, MEP. I met some of them while I was still in the Singles for Christ; I met them when I was once a catechist in Redemptorist Church in Iligan City; I met them when I was a volunteer of TULOY orphanage in Alabang. Thus, it is no surprise that volunteerism is a quality that moves me into making major decisions in life. It is deeply embedded in my soul.

And I am fortunate enough that even in my stay here in Iligan after my marriage, I got the chance to meet a lot of them getting involved in activities that I got myself into. I also had the chance to meet volunteers of Gawad Kalinga, from Global Exchange, both Filipinos and British nationals, who made themselves available for others and despite their potentials to seek personal vainglory in their young careers, opted to set it aside, by trying to make a difference.

How I truly admire them! And now that I am married, although things in my life have changed, it was quite a refreshing experience for me having the chance to speak with two British volunteers, all women at that, about their views in life. Plus the fact that last August 10, five of us all females made it as the first female team to join in the boat rowing competition using only bare hands in the Kilawan Festival in Kiwalan. Well, unfortunately it was our first time to practice when we are already on the actual competition. And good for me, I managed to fill the boat with waters, that made the boat sink. It was hilarious! But I truly,truly enjoyed it! I have missed a lot of true volunteers! And whenever I got the chance to meet them, I would certainly know who they are. They are people who transcends their culture. They are people who are oblivious to the world because they think that no matter how seemingly trivial their tasks are, they know they make a difference. They are people despite the absence of adulation and applause are willing to traverse the difficulty they encounter as a consequence of their decisions. They are people who amidst differences with people they work with continue to finish the goal. They are people who wants to accomplish the end but an inner peace and joy is likewise achieved.

Perhaps you too have the same aspirations at heart. And whether you have joined in an organization of volunteers or not, it doesnt matter for as long as you do things for others even of others do not recognize them, then you are already a volunteer! Find that volunteer in you! God made us all volunteers in various ways: for our spouse, for our family, for our friends, for our love ones and for various communities!

An Interesting Book on Personality!

It's been such a long time since I got a time to pick up a book and read it cover to cover, until a week ago and its refreshing to be transported back again to new learning.

Well, its not that the concepts are totally new to me since I am a graduate of BS Psychology, somehow many terms have been familiar to me especially the discipline and the field itself.

What interest me about this book is perhaps its relevance to my present status in life as a married person. Since the time I got married, I have been preoccupied with many peculiar adjustments about myself to the point that reading seems the last priority. After long years of continuous study, my mind seemed to explode in many things that I learn and I find emptiness if I am unable to apply them in practical situations of life. And so when I finally got the chance to take hold and read a book, I felt refreshed. And I am seeing it from the point of view of a married woman.

The book I am talking about is the "Personality Plus" written by Florence Littauer. In the book she discusses four basic types of personality. Although I have encountered more types in other psychological theories, I find her description simple and easy to remember.

Before I read the book, I took the Personality Profile Test related to it. Thus, prior to reading it thoroughly, I have already identified what type of personality I got. Somehow the results truly show basic characters of me. I got the combination of the two types. What inspires me more as I read through it is the fact that the author who is a woman, has the same combination of personality type that I got and the man she married is possessed with the same personality combination that my husband got. So I can truly relate to her experience.

She pointed out that the four basic types of personality are the following: Popular Sanguine, Perfect Melancholic, Powerful Choleric and Peaceful Phlegmatic. Each of these personality types has its own strengths and weaknesses and although she discusses only four types, she recognizes that at any rate, each individual remains unique, only that he has certain inclination and methods of understanding the world around him.

Popular Sanguine are extrovert, talker and optimist. They have appealing personality, life of the party, sincere at heart, always a child, cheerful and bubbling over, wide-eyed and innocent, physically holds on to listener, good sense of humor, good on stage, changeable disposition, lives in the present. These are basic emotions of a popular Sanguine. At work, a popular sanguine volunteers for jobs, thinks up new activities, looks great on the surface, creative and colorful, has energy and enthusiasm, inspires other to join, charms others to work and starts in a flashy way. As a friend a popular sanguine makes friend easily, loves people, thrives on compliments, seems exciting, envied by others, doesnt hold grudges, apologizes quickly, prevents dull moments and like spontaneous activities. These are basic strengths of a Popular Sanguine.

Then Littauer also described the second type of personality, the Perfect Melancholic.Emotionally, Perfect Melancholic are deep and thoughtful, analytical, serious and purposeful, genius prone, talented and creative, artistic, philosophical and poetic, appreciative of beauty, sensitive to others, self-sacrificing, conscientious and idealistic. At work, a Perfect Melancholic is schedule-oriented, perfectionist, high standard, detail conscious, persistent and thorough, orderly and organized, neat and tidy, economical, sees the problems, finds creative solutions, needs to finish what is started and likes chart, graphs,figures,lists. As a friend, a Perfect Melancholy makes friend cautiously, content to stay in the background, avoids causing attention, faithful and devoted, will listen to complaints, can solve other's problems, deep concern for other people, seeks ideal mate and moved to tears with compassion.

The third type as Littauer discussed is the Powerful Choleric. On emotion, he is born leader, dynamic and active, compulsive need for change,must correct wrongs, strong willed and decisive, unemotional, not easily discouraged, independent and self-sufficient, exudes confidence and can run anything. At work, a Powerful Choleric is goal oriented, sees the whole picture, organizes well, seeks practical solutions, moves quickly to action, delegates work, insists on production, makes the goal, stimulates activity and thrives on opposition. He has little need for friends, will work for group activity, will lead and organize, is usually right and excels in emergencies.

The last type is the Peaceful Phlegmatic. The Peaceful Phlegmatic are introvert. They are low-key personality, easygoing and relaxed, calm, cool and collected, patient, well balanced, consistent life, quite but witty, sympathetic and kind, keeps emotion hidden, happily reconciled to life and all purpose person. As a worker, he is competent and steady, peaceful and agreeable, has adminsitrative abilit, mediates problems, avoids conflicts, good under pressure, finds the easy way. And as a friend, Peaceful Phlegmatic is easy to get along with, pleasant and enjoyable, inoffensive, good listener, dry sense of humor, enjoys watching people, has many friends and has compassion and concern.

Those are just the basics of each personlity type. If you are able to read the book in its entirety, you will see how we can improve and complement in each other. After reading it, one will realize that God after all created us with our own strengths and weaknesses. We are indeed unique. All of us has something to give and must be willing to receive.

And if you are to know how did I score in the self-examination test: I scored in almost same figures of a Popular Sanguine and a Powerful Choleric. And I suppose that my husband is a Melancholic and a Powerful Choleric. You can only imagine how both of us struggled in our marriage. I would like to achieve in things but I want to do it in a fun way, not serious. But my husband would also like to accomplish things but he does it very seriously. And since we both want are ways done, we ended up imposing on each other what we think is the best approach.

When I was done reading the book, it somehow enlightened me. And instead of suffering for my husband's melancholic character, I try to understand that its how he is made by God. In that fashion, I would be able to minimize the duel in our household. (By the way, he is starting to read the book now. I am hopeful it would help him understand my nature too. :-)

In all these, I have come to realize that truly all of us is essential for each other. Sometimes, we find it hard to understand our own brothers or sisters or mother or parents or siblings or children or friends, relatives, people in the communtity we got ourselves involved into but if we also take a look at their basic profile, we shall also unburden ourselves for the pain they have caused in us which in truth and in fact, they do not mean to cause. It is just their nature.

And indeed the journey to personality improvement is a constant effort and having read such a book at this point in my life, have greatly aided me.

But then again, we must always connect all this to One Who made us. Human understanding is a mere tool. Understanding God Himself and listening to Him remains to be the solid foundation as to how we look at other people and how we understand ourselves.

Love!

Love...

Perhaps there is no word in the world that best describes the essence of every man than the word LOVE.

Love is first and foremost the very definition of God when we say God is love. And since all of us comes and is created by God, then by Divine Right, none of us are exempted to this great meaning of Love.

Every human person born, whether wanted or not by his parents (unfortunately many children are born to parents who do not want them), are made to be loved and to love in return. In many psychology books I have read, every single person wears an unseen word "Please give me attention" and this unseen words are displayed in various forms of behavior just so other people would notice them especially from people who are significant to them like their parents, siblings, husband, or wife or even in friendly relationships. Sometimes the displayed behavior are done appropriately such as a childing wanting his parents' attention would excel in school, behave accordingly and other kinds of appreciable behavior. Nonetheless, there are those who display these unseen words in a catastrophic manner just as when a child does violent things, engaging into drugs, creation of unhealthy relationships, just so they are able to get the attention of the significant persons in their lives. But in either of these two different patterns of behavior in getting attention, one thing is certain, they are all translated into the need of a person to be loved.

This is because we are designed by God to be nurtured and to nurture in return. If there is anything we must never give up in life, it is LOVE. It is the essence of our existence. No one can live without it. We are made to show love. Whether we are raised abundantly with it from people who has touched our lives or none of it, we are nonetheless always wanting it and must give it.

Other people would probably say, how can I do that, I have never experience being loved in the first place? And how can I give something I do not have.

Well, its simple. Just know how much God loves you. He has created you in His own image and likeness. That truth alone suffices. However, from a psychological point of view, it is not achievable unless the person has underdone into counselling and therapies, and these services are not easily available nowadays and are not even within reach. As such, I suggest that one must get himself involved in communities. It could probably just be the beginning. All of us are wounded in our lifetime, some greatly, some lightly... but we must move forward. And the greatest vehicle of which is FORGIVENESS. Withour forgiveness, we are at loss. We are bound to suffer pain by our own doing. And although forgiveness is a difficult thing to do, one must deliberately choose it. Forgiveness is the only vehicle that can effectively give us love even we are also wounded by the people from whom we expect to be loved. If we are in a community trying to attain a common goal of creating change for the betterment of this world and for the rest of mankind, then little by little, healing comes. And this is what is called the ability of each one of us to become wounded healers for the others.

Apparently, love is a choice. It must be worked out. It is hard. It's really hard. But which is harder to live in suffering? Or to work it out now and eventually reach the fullness of our being, the essence why we are here in this world, why we are born in the first place, why we are where are, why we are doing what we do.

God is love. And so we are love.

On Being Childless

I have been married for more than two years already. It's not a surprise if oftentimes I hear people asking me why don't I have a child yet...

You cannot imagine how to difficult it is to answer such question. Sometimes people assume that my husband and I deliberately refuse to have children. But there are some too who seriously are emphatic on our predicament and even offers prayers helping me and my husband storming the heavens for the gift of a child.

Several times, I have been a principal sponsor to weddings along with my husband and all those whom we sponsored are now raising their infants and kids. I have seen friends who have been married later than us and are now rejoicing in the fact of pregnancy.

Well, at first my husband thinks it was alright for us not to have children. He said he marries me for me and not because of the children I begot. But as time flew by, with all much effort and medical help we sought, and we remain childless, I could somehow sense that he too really wants to have a child pretty soon. And that only the two of us living in our home simply lacks an important person to fill our home: the gift of a child. It doesnt matter to us that we both make ourselves available in service to other people just us both of us are gifted with it. It doesnt really matter of how many people comes to us for help, or how well we find in wisdom in every situation. In all truth, we lack something. And it is not hidden from the people.

Just as I feel genuinely happy for the children born from other mothers, as I consider every child a gift from God, I cannot help but continue to hope and pray that one day,my time to experience in receiving the greatest gift a woman is possesed: that of being a mother, can actually come true.

Somehow, it cannot be denied that the faith in God that I carry inside helps me so much in staying in tranquility and at peace, carrying the truth that God's Omnipotence is greater than anything and that He knows best for all of us. In all these, I choose to keep my faith, hope and love.

Growing Up in Politics...

The world of politics is a thing that I have always abhorred.

You see I was raised by a family who are heavily involved in politics especially on my mother's paternal side where I spent the first 12 years of my life. Majority of the relatives that has created a significant role of my life during childhood are from my mother's side. Way back then, I thought it was a family's role to always lead people, to organize them, and to make them feel part of us. Well, it was none of such a huge political clan but it operates on the level of a barangay, a remote barangay at that, where my grandfather used to rule. But to my young mind, I thought that being looked upon is a natural-given role that the best among my kins should play. Even within our nuclear family, my parents endowed in my hands the chance to discipline my own siblings, being the eldest child; it doesnt matter if I were a girl, at least during the first twelve (12) years of my life. Even when I was already away from home studying in a city only enjoying frequent visits from my parents and younger siblings, my parents continually instill in my younger brothers and sister, respect to my decision. It went on and on and I thought the role is a thing that naturally belongs to me.

Nonetheless, my natural need to always put God in my life, seem to pave a way in molding me on how it is to be a servant leader like Christ. I had that chance to learn them. It was a painstaking endeavor to extract away from myself the thought that leadership is actually not a thing I can demand on others but a thing that I must continually work for. I was introduced to a new concept of leadership. I learned to reach out to others but always and always, it keeps on coming back to me how I was raised. And admittedly, it always show in my demeanor. Most of the time, I tend to speak more fully when I am among good and intelligent men because I could sense that I can relate to them in many things. And I only keep very few female friends. I can count them on my fingers. And this attitude creates a negative impression about me especially within the context of Filipino culture. It is not a normal trend that a woman imbued with delicate features could actually relate in mind towards the male psyche. And for many times I thought that if I didn't possess such a very feminine nature, I would not be subjected to such negative impression. This struggle is a constant experience. And I would always attribute it to the fact, that subconsciously I carry the thought that there's no dileanation between a man and a woman as far as leadership is concerned. I am still a product of how my family raised me despite the various learning I received.

But I find myself in dichotomy at all times because I still carry an antagonism and bias against many people in politics. I do not like the way they behave and think about other people. And most probably because, I do not like most of them heavily engaged in corruption, in lousy public service and in mediocre moral values. Or maybe because I felt that my own kins are also into it. And I did not like them acting like little politicians and not bringing any improvements in their personal lives in many aspects. And I wanted so much to evoke change and bring God's values into their political lives. My kins wanted me to carry the yoke of carrying that aspect of going into the realm of politics. I just turn them down thinking that service is a thing I can better do among people who keeps low profile, people who works even when no one gives them public acclamation, only living in the hidden thought that their service are rewarded when they shall finally be rewarded in Heaven.

That has always been my thought. But on the other hand, I kept asking myself, should I allow evil politicians to dominate in governing the country that I love? I was always looking for an answer because I really have real concern for the country of my birth.

And then I met a man who is heavily engaged into politics who eventually became a well-respected friend. His works are truly marked by exemplar public service, free from corruption and he has the ability to work with the downtrodden just as he gains the respect of many good people in the society. This man somehow created light and new perspective that good people can actually have a way in governing this country. That for so long as there are still many good and selfless people willing to cast their votes for this kind of politician, then this country has still hopes because deep in my heart I still have so much faith in the heart of Filipino people.

Well, in many years, the man I talked about, married me a couple of years ago. And so, I now find myself being part once again in the world of politics, brushing elbows with many of them, some I truly like, some I can never like, some I still try to like.

The politics that I abhorred becomes mine and my hopes are high that this man continues to bring his idealism into the real world. And more than anything else, I pray that his talent should not be attributed mainly as his own, but a gift coming from God, hence, should be put to good use and in the end God's glory shall be manifested in his humble service. And I pray that I would continue to be a woman, a wife, and hopefully a mother, faithful to life of service in whatever form,taking my strength from the One who made us all.

In the end I'd say... I had experience growing up in politics, abhorred it but is now married to a politician. God's way is totally beyond me. And I have no right to find explanation. I just make myself His own and follow every step that comes along the way. It's no easy road, its no easy task, but I must do my share as God directs it. And so must all of us, however God molded us!

Filipino Women Today: How are They?

I find it really an interesting issue to discuss about Filipino women today. Almost two decades ago in one of my English class requirements, I tackled on the issues of Filipino women comparing them from the women of past generation and the generation of women at the time I made that paper. Way back then, internet was still a year way to its operation in the world. Mobile phones and text messages were not yet available. And in the university where I was schooled, at MSU-IIT in Iligan City, in Mindanao, the past time of the students were just the chances of meeting each other in personal social gatherings. Students used to connect to each other in a personal manner. It was also at that time when changes of women's perspective have changed and how Filipino men viewed them.

At that time, I thought I already made a significant impression of the differences in women as I compared them to the past generation, how they behave, how they interact with the opposite sex, how they handle courtships, how they view family and how they value the essence of being a woman. Little did I know that there would be a huge differences in all aspects when the age of internet arrived, a year after I made my paper on Filipino women.

History tells us that women as far as how they are viewed by society varies from culture to culture, from generation to generation, but here in the Philippines, women have relatively evolved depending upon the people that colonizes her country. As stated by most history book writers, before the Spanish Era, Filipino women were made equal to that of men, as maternal and paternal lineage were recognized at that time.And because of this bilateral kinship system, women were given great power in their own clan.

But with the Spaniards' arrival bringing the Catholic faith and introduced them to the Filipinos, it has made women on secondary position. And so women were left mostly in the house, taking care of the household and played no relevant decision in the unfolding of the society.

With the arrival of Americans, doctrines of self-improvement and empowerment have been upheld and that paved a way of making women professionals in various fields acquiring esteem in their own right.

Consequently, it is clear that there is truly an evolution of Filipino women nowadays, especially with the advent of latest technology and gadgets. It changed people's lives, it changed many systems and it also changes some basic psyche of Filipino women.

Nowadays, Filipino women are more exposed to variety of options, whether she lives in rural or urban areas, it doesnt really matter; the technology has gotten into her.

And now you can see Filipino women attaining respect and created niche in various fields. You can see them in the fields of law, medicine, politics (although at a limited extent), business sector,technological advancements, scientific contribution and some helped in the building of communities whether in social service or in their own church's service and there are also women working abroad employed as nurses, doctors, engineers, skilled workers, domestic helpers and some in the field of entertainment in almost all part of the world.

Due to this changes, Filipino women nowadays are generally regarded highly by society caused by the important contribution and impact they have made in their respective families, which up to this day remains the main and basic value of a Filipino women.

Nonetheless, I am also alarmed by the fact that just as women have significantly changed over the years, it has somehow created confusion in the psyche of their male counterpart. They seem at lost on how to treat women and how do they place themselves in the significant Filipino women in their lives.

Just as I value women being given equal dignity in all aspects of life, I am also concerned about the well-being and ability of men to develop their own sense of pride, a natural gift entrusted to them by God as men and I cannot afford seeing them helpless and unable to function in decision- making and I would really like them to keep the dignity they have always carried attributed to their natural ability and talents.

Although I have met many of men I highly admired and regarded with respect, I also found a growing number of men who are utterly confused and who are already comfortable seeing significant women in their lives run things for them.

It would be more pleasing to see women attaining a good sense of dignity and pride for their own gifts and virtues and value but nothing is more pleasing if along this change, men also attain greater pride for having women like them and not to fail in seeing their own contribution too.

At any rate, this is a stage of adjustment to both of them and I am seeing signs that Filipino men can greatly improve in this respect. I am positive, awareness of possibility greatly aids in improvement.